best advice ever

Dear Slut Machine, I have a crush on my guy friend's roommate. I'm tempted to tell my friend that I heart his roommate, but I'd rather handle my own business. How do I go about showing his roommate that I'm interested without using my friend as a middle-man?

Orchestrate a situation (without making it seem like an orchestration) where you guys are all together at a time you think you will all get drunk. Like, drunk drunk. It'll work itself out from there. If they don't drink, then I can't imagine them being fun to hang out with, so you should just fuck the roommate and then peace on them both. If you don't drink, then maybe you should, if you're having problems like this. Happy holidays!

so good

this post is dedicated to ali's photobucket...

HHAHHAHHAHAHAH SOOO FUCKING GOOD!!!

things i wish i had said to clinton from what not to wear but didn't because i acted too cool for school

spotted:

-adam goldberg. at my coffee cart. every day.

-anna sui at film forum. october 30.

-clinton kelly from what not to wear. today.

so i have an unspoken agreement with myself that whenever i see celebs or ["celebs" ex. anyone from a reality show, anyone in a band] i completely ignore them.
[case in point: bjork, uncle karl lagerfeld himself]

today when i saw clinton from what not to wear i walked on by but now im kicking myself...mainly because i have some prevailing unanswered questions that i believe mr. argyle sweater would be able to sort out for me. mainly:

1. what is clinton and stacy's collective opinion on vintage/secondhand? they always seem to show disgust towards anything that isn't a total 'classic' wardrobe staple. going by their theories, none of us would be considered 'stylish' even though our demographic is what provides inspiration for many designers these days [the proper term is 'trickle up fashion']. so theoretically, if stacy and clinton were to come to bedford avenue on a saturday, they would be appalled, right?
also, it is a proven fact that these two despise 'mom jeans.' what would they say when they explore popular fashion trends of the moment and discover that high waisted jeans are all the rage?? this is important. i need to know.

2. ok this doesn't directly relate to clinton, but why does nick arrojo [the haircutter guy] always give the worst soccer mom coifs?

3. what happens after the first round when the makeover subject goes shopping on her own and inevitably buys all the wrong shit [ie miniskirts when they're supposed to be looking for a-line knee length ones]? they only have a limit of $5,000 so if they spend $3,000 on the first day, and only half of the clothes are good, do they have to return the rest? help!

4. this one is for megan:
what brand is that weird airbrush on make up that carmindy uses? and where can we buy it?

ok clinton, im after you now.
you must live near here, right?
help me solve these mysteries!

anyone?

does anyone watch tell me you love me? im so into it! and no one else is, ughh. i know it seems really boring and depressing and i guess it kind of is, but im hooked! they show pubes! old people have sex! masturbation, semen, lottsa boobs, plus boone from lost is on it, etc. etc.

Something

i notice that whenever I'm in a thrift store, all ambitious and ready to find awesome shit, i always look around for other hipsterish girls to see what my competition is. then when i find cool things, i feel all victorious about it. this happened yesterday.

ATTENTION:

YOU GUYS ALL SERIOUSLY FUCKING SUCK!

= )

better late than never...

EMMYS
favorite:

becki newton

least favorite:

hayden panettiere

VMAs
favorite:
none. seriously, they were all terrible. i almost went with rihanna but her dress really wasn't that great.

least favorite:

alicia keys

ATTENTION:

everyone post a picture of your favorite and least favorite emmy dresses!

while we're at it, let's do the VMAs too

uhhh

okay i just got direct tv (which means i want to start smoking more weed also), and i'm obsessed with the Fashionista Diaries on soapnet. ive never really been a reality show gal (except for some Top Model of course - but i've never even seen an episode of Project Runway!), but seriously, I can't get enough of this show! I can't embed, but here's a link to a clip.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=O1XBRbewzq0

I'm kind of annoyed i didnt think of this first

Edited by Thurston Moore

The “punk house” may come in any number of forms. The most common type is often where a large group of like-minded punks cram into a house usually intended to accommodate two or three people, resulting in low rent and, thus, extended hours of leisure for the residents to pursue their true interests.

Punk House features anarchist warehouses, feminist collectives, tree houses, workshops, artists’ studios, self-sufficient farms, hobo squats, community centers, basement bike shops, speakeasies, and all varieties of communal living spaces. In over 300 images of fifty houses in twenty-five cities in the US, photographer Abby Banks finds the already weathered face of a seventeen-year-old runaway; the soft hands of a vinyl junkie (record collector); the mohawked show-goer; the dirty dishes in the sink; silk screened posters on the wall; and many other revealing glimpses of these anarchist interiors.

i think mandy moore looks sooo precious in this photo!!
it's such a danielle outfit. she even has your same haircut!
get on the puffy sleeve shirt thing and you're set.
i think she might be wearing jeans with no back pockets though, unacceptable.

Dear Diary

I'm finallyyy reading Dear Diary, and I obviously knew I'd like it cos her column is really the only thing I like about Vice, but seriously, omggg. I mean I have a few problems with it, but how therapeutic! I'm only up to the part where she starts doing drugs, and I don't really care about the whole raver phase and heroin addiction part cos it's not really relevant to me, you know, but so far, the whole beginning part of growing up on LI, hardcore shows, hanging out with older dudes, and mean girls in middle school?? Then it kind of made me dig out all these old memories and demons I had from the past and fucked with me. Life is so weeeeird. Did you guys read it?

douchiest celeb quote of the day 2

“It’s a funny misconception with her. People always think she’s really angry and she’s really mad and she really hates everyone, and doesn’t care about anything, when the thing she cares about most is her fans and her music.”

- Avril Lavigne’s husband, Sum 41 singer Deryck Whibley, tells the Edmonton Sun.

douchiest celeb quote of the day

"We saw a rainbow, and I photographed it on my new iPhone."
-Pete Wentz

marc jacobs shop employees- they're just like us!!

ok girls, be prepared to have your collective minds blown!
i was in the marc jacobs shop on bleecker the other day having a browse at ovepriced, overhyped clothing, totally in a daze..when all of a sudden i heard something familiar coming from the overhead speakers...
i looked up to witness the 3 manorexic, holier than thou store employees FINGER POINTING and singing along to kid dynamite!
i started singing along to myself.. [i can't believe i remember the words after all this time! i have to go search secondhand bins at record shops for the cd since mine is in a basement on long island somewhere]..anyway where was i? oh yeah..at what point do you think these guys decided to trade in their texas is the reason tshirts for mj sports coats?
anyway it was fun watching the rich old ladies look confused and crinkle their noses at the 'racket' that ensued. it really helped clear the snobbery from the place..more high end designers should look into hiring ex punk kids to work for them!

SamRon

Samantha Ronson? yes, no? to me, she seems like a kind of crazy manic socialite bad DJ who is kind of really cheesy and doesn't matter at all, even in hollywood. then i saw this:
now i can't decide how i feel!
look at her dog!
she's obsessively in love with Lindsey Lohan and is not afraid to let the world know!
(i heard they're actually dating???)

dude, wtf!

Danielle Mussafi
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Miscellaneous Crew:
"The American Experience" (intern) (1 episode, 2005)
- Kinsey (2005) TV Episode (intern)
Kinsey (2005) (TV) (intern)
"Frontline" (intern) (1 episode, 2004)
- The Persuaders (2004) TV Episode (intern)


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Genres: Documentary / Biography
STARmeter: down 3% since last week


yo you see that shit? my IMDB STARmeter is down 3% from last week!! this is a fucking travesty! i mean, what did i do wrong?? i felt pretty good this week, too!!

the crest

so i was just watching vh1 like.. most outrageous celebrity real estate or something equally as interesting, or rather, completely not interesting, and ryan seacrest came on. here's how it played out:


unfunny 'comic'/talking head: "he bought richard dreyfuss' old house!! he has a million jobs and is on tv and the radio 24/7. he's going to be in hollywood forever!!"

me: "holy fuck he totally is!..haha richard dreyfuss!?"


so this man is literally the new dick clark, or, if you prefer, the dick clark of our generation. he'll really be here forever. like, when we're 47 he'll be hosting new years eve times square no doubt. so then i, obviously, became really interested in him. did i mention i was high? anyway, i was like.. hm, it's pretty weird that he's everywhere on tv and shit and i don't know anything about him "personally" except for those really fucking unfortunate pictures where he was kissing teri hatcher and those were fucking gross. so i wiki him and begin to read.


Ryan John Seacrest (born December 24, 1974) is an American radio, television personality, and anchorman. Seacrest is also a former children's game show host, who gained prominence as the host of the reality television talent-search series American Idol. In 2004, he joined Casey Kasem the host of American Top 40, and he has co-hosted Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin' Eve with Dick Clark since 2005.


omg boring!! can you even read that??? i can't! nah, just kidding.. i mean, i read like three more paragraphs but totally couldn't read anymore cause i remembered that i didn't give one little shit about this dude. i'll let him host my e! shows and say witty things to simon and interview boring celebs while standing on red carpets but i mean, i guess that's as far as our relationship is gunna go. either way, ewwww:



i've never meant the phrase "gag me with a spoon" more. but the real villian in this photo has to be the hatch. she is soo the beast here.

MUSSAFI OUT

this is what happens when my best friends go to florida...

i went to nick's at 1am, right before he deflated the blow up castle and kicked everyone out. i bought a bag from mike and drove home, stopping at mcdonalds on the way. while i was waiting on the really long line, this fucking frantic woman comes up to my car and is like freaking. she said her friends were too drunk to take her home and she needed money for a cab or a ride or whatever. so i'm like okay yea totally get in. so she gets in my car and fucking smells like pee and b.o. so...

i have to finish this tomorrow cause i'm soo high and ican't type anymore

remind me to mention the pete wentz bar