spotted: perfect bathing suit

Carmen Marc Valvo Twisted Bandeau
bloomingdales. $158.00

i can't imagine this not looking good! and it's really cute and classy and hides a good amount of what needs to be hid but because of the strapless top it's not like, too much, you know? and i love that it's white, although within five minutes on me it will most def be stained with coffee. is it worth $158.00?? i have no idea. this is the scary thing about having money and not having to pay rent/food/utilities (thanks dad).. i totally could afford this, but should i?

here are some other options, also mad loot.

option 2: Our Exclusive Gottex Skirted Bandeau
bloomingdales. $89.98

i like the shape but i'm not totally amazed by the colors/print. it looks like outer space but in a weird, off-setting way. like outer space on a bad acid trip. or outer space drunk for the first time, wobbling around making the other universes uncomfortable.

option 3: DKNY Draped Swimsuit Dress
bloomingdales. $112.00

eh, decent. i like how the bottom looks but that's about it. and it's so plain and basic that if you took like $100 bucks off of the price, i'd maybe be like "hm, maybe." donna karan has some balls.

option 4: Juicy Couture Metallic Stripe Ruffled Maillot
bloomingdales. $168.00

kind of cheesy but also kind of cute. it looks fun to wear you know? like i imagine myself playing frisbee in it but somehow in my dream i can actually throw and catch the frisbee, not drop it / miss it each time and have to slug my lazy ass all around the field picking the fucking thing up.

option 5: Juicy Couture Beach Skirted Bikini Bottoms
nordstroms. $65.00 (bottoms only)

if i actually continue to "work out" (term used very loosely) like i have been, maybe i'd go for a two piece. and if i were to go for a two piece, i'd maybe go for this one. my problems with two pieces are usually the bottoms. i always feel like i have to wear shorts you know? and i don't want to anymore because it's just not the ideal beach day when you have soggy, wet cotton falling off of your ass and stretching out and smelling weird. anyway, i like these. they are a good alternative to the boy shorts bottoms. the one piece is cute too:
but i'd want the draping to hide a little more vag.


HAPPY SUMMER!

thoughts on desperate housewives...

so, i have watched seasons one through three of desperate housewives consecutively over the past few months. some issues i had with the portrayal of characters on season two were more than accurately written about by none other than, jennifer l. pozner on her blog in 2006. you can read her article here: http://www.wimnonline.org/WIMNsVoicesBlog/?p=162 i am now seven episodes away from completing the third season and want to share some of my new found concerns. if you're not a dh fan, i apoligize in advance. anyway, in season two when andrew is all OOC or whatev, his conserv parents are primarily not down with the fact that he's gay. well, when he comes back from living on the streets and PROSTITUTING, bree is totally cool with him and all like, "OH ANDREW, YOU'RE SUCH AN ANGEL" (even though he fucking tried to blackmail her and destroy her life). but in order to regain his place in the family, he totally compromises his sexuality! like after he comes back, they NEVER talk about him being gay and his boyfriend is totally out of the picture, even though that dude was actually really good. this show plays into so many reagan family values/basic instinct kinda shit. like for example, nora, tom's baby mama is a threat to the perfect, idealistic scavo family and what happens to her?? SHE DIES! andrew can be gay, and give blow jobs for money but if he just becomes asexual and forgets about his attraction to men, justice will be restored on wisteria lane. although, i'm not sure what's gonna happen on the last several episodes, i do know that danielle is now the slut. can't wait to find out what happens to the illegitimate baby!! ps - there's a book called "reading desperate housewives: beyond the white picket fence" and i bet there's a chapter discussing this exact same thing. most likely written by pozner (fucking monopolizer) amazon customer review: "I bought this book as a fan of Desperate Housewives. It is, however, inappropriate for most fans. It is a collection of 17 essays on DH, primarily feminist writings. I slogged through three essays and gave up. They seem to be well-written, but they were just too academic and dry for me. The chapters are (1) Culture, (2) Sexual Politics, (3) Genre, Gender, and Cultural Myths, (4) Narrative, Confssion and Intimacy. All of these topics are of interest to me, but I still couldn't handle the writing style and content---just too dry and frankly, boring. If you are looking for very serious, academic writing, and are a DH fan, you could potentially enjoy this book." hahha is it bad that that review sounds really appealing to me? UPDATE: literally a few hours after writing this, andrew casually told lynette that he was "doing the soda delivery guy" for the pizza place her and her husband own. there goes my theory

ebay dismay

on the topic of ebay, can you gals recommend any good ebay stores i should look at? or like tips on how to find good stuff? i was really into ebay in like 10th grade when i sold all my sailor moon paraphanalia (and made a bank!) but since then i've totally neglected the wonderful services ebay offers. mainly because i fear it's power.

this is the best ebay auction i've ever seen

Vintage early 80s Tankini - the first one ever made!

I saw this 3 piece Tankini in Bloomingdales Juniors dept in 1984 so I bought it for my trip to Fiji - way before "Survivor"! I think I paid $24.00 for it. It was rather 'Punk" for the time, and I was in my Punk phase with two-toned hair that I usually spiked, but not sightseeing Fiji. This wonderful Tankini attracted the attention of three awesome dudes, one from Canada, One from New Zealand and the short one my favorite - from France -oh-la-la. Check out those short shorts! Back then there were no real bridges over rivers, the last photo shows the car we rented going over a so called "bridge" of planks. Real Survivor living before it became popular!

The Tankini has lasted in very nice condition - at least the 2 top pieces. The bottom is stretched out and cannot be worn. It is a cotton knit - hot pink stripes with heather grey. Size 5/6 but will also fit a small built medium - has some stretch. This is a very Unique bathing suit from the Punk Rock 80s.

Smells clean $5.00 Shipping requested ..

so sheela just pointed out to me that "john:316" is printed on the bottom of the yellow forever 21 bags. upon further investigation, i found that this is in fact, completely true.














apparently this bible verse is:
"For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life."

i have no idea what that means because i'm pretty sure nothing in the bible means anything but WHAT THE FUCK!! WHY? i think it might mean that if i don't believe in jesus, i'm going to hell (big surprise) or something, right? like, correct me if i'm wrong but WHAT??!

i did some google searching and apparently in-n-out burger has been using this subtle form of evangelizing for years. this is so completely creepy and disgusting to me.

pic (s) of the day

ok paranoia... i worry about the fact that there's no water in the pool, but you don't think any of them are actually going to jump, right? i mean it's kind of cruel if you think about it, it's obviously hot out and they are so close to the pool, they're even wearing BATHING SUITS but they can't go in? they all look amazing though, i want the stripey swimsuit on the far right.




oh HELLO random 1960's babes without a care in the world. can i trade lives with you?



ok if proof ever existed that i need to start a fashion line, this is it. i would call these overalls 'spirit fingers'.




imagine if uncle karl and andre leon talley were the president and vice president, respectively?
it's too brilliant an idea to even toy with.





this is in honor of the fact that i got picked up by sailors this past weekend. i totally wanted to do the jitterbug with them.



this sassy mama was the star of some 1970's tv show. LOVE the glasses, hair, and thermal shirt.



these guys are totally my idols. imagine if our crew rolled with a dog like this? FIERCE.

business ideas

1. cigarette rehab: rich people pay mad money to come stay at some nice resort and take a week out of their lives to just fucking quit the stogers already. i think the break from everyday life is key, you know? its all you have to focus on while getting tan and playing tennis. or staying in and playing wii tennis - which i just did and i am SWEEAATIING holy shit. anyway, you can be as bitchy as you want cause everyone will be bitchy. NIGHTLY BITCH FESTS AROUND THE FIRE!! and you'd be with mad people supporting you, helping you.. just chillin in the same boat. obvs we'd give out nicorette gum/patches like it's air. this was actually jay's idea originally but i mean, fuck that, this isn't his blog.

2. paparazzi for tourists: people walk in and pay like some ridiculous amount of money to feel like a celebrity via paparazzi styled photo shoots. there's this huge wall with automatic cameras aiming at a red carpet for them to stand on. or we could change the background to be of them sitting at the ivy or walking down the street if they want the shots to look like they are candid. we could green screen this shit and go buckwild!! each camera (maybe there's like 15 of them?) would take about 20+ pictures each in about 2 minutes so they'll be able to see the crazy wall of flashes the celebs must see.. there could be cardboard cut outs of celebs to pose with or people could just pose with their friends. maybe there's fancy dresses people can put on too! then they pick their fav pics and get their own "in touch" cover made with whatever headlines they want. COME ON!! we could even airbrush them! i think this could be huge in new york/la in the touristy areas. fuck it, it could be huge in oklahoma. i'm kind of dead serious about this one.

more to come...